


Building A Bridge to Your Heart

by AssyPiff



Category: Peter Kay's Car Share (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-13
Updated: 2018-06-13
Packaged: 2019-05-21 17:41:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14919945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AssyPiff/pseuds/AssyPiff
Summary: Kayleigh's and John's thoughts the night of the finale





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I may be wrong but I feel as I have been accused of plagiarism by another writer. I am really upset by this as I have never intentionally copied anything anyone has written. I may have to take a break for a while as there is no come back for such an accusation.I am not going to get into a Twitter war of words...but this is in danger of totally ruining the absolute joy I have gained in writing. I will state again...I have never or will never intentionally copy another writers work.

"Oh lordy, I thought I was the sensitive and paranoid one" - those words of Kayleigh's kept repeating themselves on a never-ending loop around John's head. He had eventually made it home that day after his Fiat had been towed to the repairers and he had seen Kayleigh home, their joined hands giving him a contentment he had rarely felt despite the disastrous encounter with that effing hedgehog.

John had buried his insecurities behind a gruff exterior which Kayleigh had very quickly penetrated and dismantled with her sweet nature, her fluffy logic and beautiful smile. But that night his demons came a-visiting with a vengeance, earlier than their usual time of 1:21. Like Marley's ghost they would remind him what a miserable sod he was, how he was undeserving of happiness and undeserving of someone as wonderful as Kayleigh. He was an overweight, outwardly grumpy, assistant manager of a supermarket...hardly Brad Pitt...as Kayleigh reminded him daily with her open and quite frankly horny appraisal of Ted 2 from the safety of his front seat. How could he ever hope to compete? He had fought his demons for weeks now and had hardly allowed himself to hope that a woman as vivacious and lovely as Kayleigh would stay with him once she really got to know him. He would drive her away and his broken heart would never recover. She'd said "Trust me John, I know you", and that was true to an extent. He'd allowed her more glimpses of the real unguarded him than he ever had with anyone else.

When he had got home that night he had made himself a brew and sat rather stunned as he thought about the events of the day. What had befuddled him more was that Kayleigh had forgiven him even after the things he had said to her. His words were born out of panic and fear. Panic that she had made him confront his feelings for her, feelings that he was hoping to keep to himself and fear of what she would expect from him.

When he was a young man the sex with Anna had been wild and adventurous. He had flung himself in wholeheartedly with her, whilst knowing that there wasn't much of a connection there apart from the sex. She had quickly grown away from him once she had started Uni, where he definitely did not fit in. Sex with Charlotte had been fairly mundane if he was honest...it had him feel more lonely, frustrated and unloved.  
Kayleigh, however, had somehow seeped into his every pore to such an extent that every thought inevitably led back to her. She loved him despite of himself and he was desperate not to be a disappointment to her. "Good work in taking things slow", he mutters to himself as he washes up his empty cup and puts it on the drainer. Kayleigh grabbed life by the balls and since he had met her he had been left floundering in her wake. She had shown him that she fancied him a few times, grabbing his face and kissing him enthusiastically on their way to the safari park...bastard monkey...he could still smell monkey piss he thought even though he'd had the car valetted more times than when Stink Ray had had a lift! He was a weekly visitor to the valetters since that little bastard had hitched a ride and ruined his moment. All he had wanted to do that day was pull over and kiss her soundly, but his inner curmudgeon had won so he wouldn't even let himself play innocent car games with her. John sighed to himself, looking out his kitchen window at the hanging baskets her vouchers had bought him.

When John had asked her for time, this was precisely what he'd needed it for. To give his demons a run out to try to defeat them so he could allow himself to be happy with Kayleigh, to give her and himself the relationship they deserved. John had long-since resigned himself to being on his own with only his sad wanks to thoughts of Kayleigh to keep him company, but now she was offering herself to him and he was terrified and exhilarated all at once. He smiled as he thought of her doing her Beyonce that morning outside her house. He didn't know about Beyonce but Kayleigh was "shamazing"! She truly had no idea of the affect she had on him. She'd danced completely unselfconsciously and he'd felt the stirrings of desire for her so much so that he'd had to mentally list all the number ones of the year of his birth, 1973, to get himself under control. But his particular genie was out of the bottle, he wanted her and now it appears she wanted him too. It was as simple as that!

"Simple my arse!" John turns off the kitchen light, nothing is simple with Kayleigh he muses. She wants him! Shit! Could he secretly go on a diet and lose half his bodyweight in the ninety eight days to Donna and Rick's wedding? He might be able to fend her off until then but he felt that was the day he would have to man up and make love to her. Not that he didn't want to. ..God did he want to! It would be quite a few Our Fathers and even more Glory Be's next time he went to confession. He groaned and rubbed his eyes that were by now smarting and sore. He wanted her so much he doubted he would last as long as Usain Bolt in the hundred meters. Here was the nub of his insecurities, he'd said it but she had not properly understood what he'd meant. What if once she had seen him naked she was repulsed and realised what a mistake she had made? He knew he would never get over the pain and humiliation. What if he couldn't satisfy her and she became bored with him as he had done with Charlotte? 

John took a deep breath and suddenly he was utterly exhausted. He had to be up early to go and collect his replacement car on his way over to pick up Kayleigh. The events of the last couple of days had finally caught up with him. The all-nighter he had pulled last night to write, record and deliver her song hadn't helped as hadn't the emotional turmoil he had been through. Turning off the downstairs lights, John climbed the stairs with the image of his and Kayleigh's fingers entwined. He smiled to himself. Maybe it would be ok. Maybe he could do this. Maybe his demons would give him a break and go visit some other poor chuffer tonight. He could do this...even if he was a big gay mute!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finale night from Kayleigh's pov

After Kayleigh had got home, escorted by John still holding her hand, a fact noted by Steve who'd grinned saying "I see you two have got yourselves sorted". John had left with a sigh, a squeezed hand and dopey look. She had gone upstairs having made herself a brew and got changed into her onesie. She'd been happy to avoid Mandy as she was too delirious to be dissecting everything and defending John as she would inevitably find herself doing. Yesterday's debacle was as much her fault as his she had realised. She just wanted to forget all about it, although she would have to ask him what Elsie had meant about "putting Kayleigh in the corner". 

She sat on the end of her bed with a contented sigh and a dreamy look on her face. How different she felt from 24 hours ago. Then she had felt the most pain and humiliation that she had ever felt. Even worse than when she had discovered her drug-dealing ex had sewn E's into her knickers and that he had been poking her cousin in Wrexham. She had despaired that she would ever find a good man to love and love her back. She had thought that she had found him in John. Yesterday her dreams were shattered, today she couldn't have felt any happier. 

Hearing John's song had filled her up to the brim with love for her unlikely hero. He had sung what he couldn't say and God was it beautiful! She had meant what she's said about it being as good as Gary Barlow. She wanted to shout it from the rooftops and drive round blaring it out of the windows of John's Fiat for all the world to hear. But his reaction to her even telling anyone about his song let alone anyone hearing it gave her pause for thought. She had been so caught up with her own feelings that now she was sure of John's feelings for her she began to think about the glimpses she had had of the insecure man she loved every part of, even his hairy shoulders in his gay man's vest! Certain things he said started to come back to her as she sat there in her box bedroom with her novelty heart lamp flashing away. He'd sung in his song about needing time to do what's right...everything's happened so fast he'd said. Yes three short months of sharing his car. She had felt her feelings grow gradually as she basked in the glow of his kindness and humour every day. She had realised there was something more when both Rachel and Elsie had flirted shamelessly with him and she realized that she wanted him for herself. What a shock that little revelation had been! After her epiphany at the hands of that slapper Rachel she had started to watch John closely for signs that he felt the same. He gave away few clues, behaving much the same as usual. Except everyone seemed to see it! The sly comments had increased over the past few weeks but they had both brushed them off, although she had been secretly pleased that people were noticing what she wasn't sure if she was imagining. No-one had been quite as forthright as Elsie but she had been fluffy drunk and her memory of that evening was sketchy to say the least. There was no mistaking the look in John's eyes as he leaned in to kiss her. Even in her inebriated state she saw the longing in his gorgeous face. She had caught other glimpses of his adoring look but he usually covered it quickly and broke the moment with a jokey remark. 

Then it hit her just how scared he was! She had never thought of him that way. To her he was confident and funny. Her rock. The way he managed the people at work with a well hidden compassion beneath his gruff don't break the rules exterior. Let alone the family man he constantly displayed in his tales about his mum, his nana Rose and Paul and his family. She felt a warmth in her chest as she thought of his kindness. But the scared, insecure man she had seen in the last couple of days was a surprise to her. Should it be though? Now she thought about it, he had told her early on that he thought love was a load of old bollocks and easier to stay away from. Yet somehow he loved her anyway. 

Kayleigh drew her legs up so she was hugging her knees wishing she was hugging him. Perhaps in retrospect her daily comments about Ted 2 had had more of an affect on him than she had given credence to. She was too unguarded she knew - but really what was a girl to do when the bare-chested Adonis was before her in all his glory every day? How would she have felt if he had made comments like that about Rachel? She grimaced...it had been bad enough when Rachel had asked him out for a drink! It had hurt her when he had said "Doesn't she look well?",innocent enough anything more salacious and God knows what she would have done! Let's face it, John is old-fashioned and respectful and it would take him a while to come out of his shell. Well, she decided, she would help him with that! She chuckled to herself. She would make him realise that he was way more desirable to her than Ted2 ever would be. She wanted to fling her arms around John and never let go. A held hand and her head on his shoulder was all he could manage for now but that didn't mean she could repress her natural exuberance forever. She didn't even try to resist giving him a great big smacker on his cheek in the car. She grinned at herself remembering the pleased but embarrassed look on his face. She couldn't wait to see his face when they finally did become intimate. Give him time he had pleaded with that adorable look on his face. She would give him that. Use the time to convince him that she really did desire him body and soul and that she wasn't the piss-throwing psycho he thought she was!


End file.
